This Month in Ow

[bjarvis]

While in San Francisco for work at the IAGSDC convention, I had to the chance to catch up with theoctothorpe who was coincidentally visiting the city for other purposes. One of the kind things he did for me was take me to the gym.

I've never been to a gym before. I have some exercise equipment at home, but for the most part, I've been riding on youthful indestructibility all these years. Sadly, I'm now 46 and my extended warranty is clearly about to expire: I can no longer spoon my way to the bottom of a half-gallon of ice cream washed down with a 2L bottle of Coke Classic with casual impunity. Getting old sucks.

Anyway, theoctothorpe kindly allowed me to tag along as he visited for his regular workout, and he put me through similar paces (with lighter weights as appropriate since he is vastly stronger than me). Squates, planks, inclined leg presses, lat pull-downs, etc.: it was a bit of a blur.

Alas, after nearly 90 minutes of working out, I was feeling a bit off. I should have recognized the signs of overheating and bodily strain. I also should have hydrated in advance and sipped water sparingly during our stay there, rather than gulping water as my body attempted to cool down as quickly as possible. I should have recognized the signs of having pushed too far, but I didn't.

And then I threw up.

Just water, but still. Not pretty. And that's why I can't go back to San Francisco. Ever. *sigh* Poor theoctothorpe was so concerned & apologetic, but it wasn't anything he did: I should have recognized the symptoms and backed off earlier. Lesson learned. Some seated rest, a cool compress to my forehead and a cooling shower later helped immensely. Within two hours, I was mostly normal again, except every muscle in my body was screaming in protest over the recent workout. Standing hurt. Sitting hurt. Lifting food to my mouth hurt. We had dinner at "The Thirsty Bear," but the restrooms are upstairs. OMFG, stairs made me hurt so bad going up *and* down. When I went to the men's room again before we left, I took the elevator.

My body ached for another 48 hours. Thank god I was nearly myself again before I boarded a plane to return to DC.

With theoctothorpe's gentle urging, I've purchased a membership with LA Fitness. There is a gym about a mile from home in downtown Silver Spring. There is also a gym of the same chain about a mile from the data center where I work so I have enormous flexibility in where I go to work out. He has also created a work-out plan for me, helping me along my goal to lose some fat around the waist and improve my upper body strength. We're still tweaking the plan, but it's a great foundation and better than I could have assembled on my own in such a short time.

In the first week at the gym (typically visiting every other day), my muscles ached during & after. These days, I don't ache during the workout, I just feel depleted & wobbly: the much milder ache kicks in the following day. As I write this, my biceps are whining at me about yesterday morning's fun.

I've cut back my consumption of soft drinks by about 95%. In the past two weeks, I've enjoyed one can of ginger ale and stole a couple of sips from kent4str's drink when he pretended he wasn't looking, but that's all. I've consumed more salads and less bread than at any prior time in my life. I haven't had chocolate in nearly three weeks, no ice cream, no fruit juice and only one small gelato. All foods are evaluated (and frequently rejected) for their sugar & starch content and their overall calorie count. Protein? It feels like I've consumed an entire caribou per week. Veggies are great and fruit too as long as it's high in fibre.

Since starting with this plan, I've noticed a handful of changes. I've lost eight pounds and I'm now fitting into my 31" waist jeans comfortably (down from 32"). When I was young, I radiated heat like a blast furnace: my ex, John, used to say I could rent myself out as a space heater. That stopped about ten years ago, but I've noticed recently that eating anything causes the blast furnace effect again for about an hour. I have a fan in my computer bunker now and have needed one in the bedroom if I ate anything late in the evening.

It hasn't all been fun though. I purchased a fat loss monitor, a small device which uses electrical impedence to guestimate one's percentage of body fat and BMI. After giving it my height, weight, age, sex (yes, please!) and body type, it determined I am 20.6% fat and have a BMI of 26. The machine says I'm significantly overweight at 176 lbs and 5'9". That was a little depressing even though I know the limitations of the machine's operation. As theoctothorpe rightly points out however, I shouldn't look at the absolute numbers but use it as a baseline to chart the delta, the changes over time. It isn't that I supposedly have 20.6% body fat, but that I can track progress to lose 3-5% from whatever the reported baseline is. That said, I have no idea what my target body fat percentage should be... I'm still working on that.

The project continues. I'm impatient for measurable results, but must remind myself this is a multi-month and multi-year project. After all, it took 46 years to make me into the slob I am so it will take time to climb back out of the hole.

Comments

[excessor.livejournal.com]

I am completely entertained by this. First, congratulations on diving in! You will come to love the achiness that results from a good workout. Give it a year or two.

Are you sure that the blast furnace events aren't, in fact, early onset menopause?

Helpfully,
Me

PS You may know the gym has cameras everywhere. Have you thought about asking for the footage of your first workout?

[bjarvis.livejournal.com]

Bitch.

With love. :-)

[excessor.livejournal.com]

Maybe next time I see you we could do a workout together.

[apparentparadox]

It can't be early onset.

[dendren.livejournal.com]

hahahahahahah

[dr-scott.livejournal.com]

Normally it is considered unwise to leap right into weights without doing a little foundational work in cardio to get your system ready for heavier loading. But if you had done that we wouldn't have this painfully amusing post. ;-)

I'm ten years older and I still have the blast-furnace-after-food effect. This is probably good, a sign that your metabolism won't allow high blood sugar to last for long; failure to produce an insulin response is part of "metabolic syndrome," which leads to fat deposition and weight gain, eventually to diabetes.

The dietary discipline sounds good, basically what I do. You've been leading a charmed life if you could still drink sugared soft drinks and not suffer. You looked pretty damn good last time I saw you , just before this crash program. A few months in you will plateau for a bit, but don't let that worry you -- you will also start to feel better as the longer term effects of fitness show up and the short-term muscle soreness fades. It's rare that I feel it these days and I think of it as a sign of a good workout when I do.

[bjarvis.livejournal.com]

Well, I leapt in fairly quickly because I'd already been working with dumbbells & the home gym for several months and can do a large number of sit-ups and push-ups without excessive strain. Cardio-wise, I'm also in pretty good shape. Still, I pushed vastly further than I had before because (a) I was feeling (foolishly) ambitious, (b) I had theoctothorpe spotting & advising me so I was comfortable pushing further, and (c) the equipment allowed it more than my simpler home system. I overdid it, and paid the price. Mercifully there was no damage but to my overly-sensitive ego.

And I'm glad I brought a little amusement into your life. :-)

[ciddyguy.livejournal.com]

I'm only 2 years older than you are, roughly and have been at more or less the same weight you are, but at 5'10" or so.

Just out of curiosity, how much are those BMI guestimate thingies cost? I realize it's a way to get something as a baseline, even though in reality, they may not be exact in your actual BMI index.

In reality, I should do much of what you are doing, though for now, it's walkies up and down hills of my fair city will have to suffice.

I don't eat a half gallon of ice cream in a sitting, thankfully, but I DO eat more starch than I prolly should, though I AM eating much better too, as you may well have noted in my posts.

I've noticed I'm not as succeptible to the cooler temps than I had been, so maybe I'm doing something right?

Granted, photos of me tend to make me look more svelt than I actually am, and people still think I'm younger than I actually am (many estimate between 35-40 or so).

Good luck in your new health goals.

[bjarvis.livejournal.com]

The device I purchased is an Omron HBF-306CN, purchased on Amazon for about $35.

[mrdreamjeans.livejournal.com]

Congratulations on your progress. I am starting out on a similar journey, though considerably heavier, 13 years older and without Christopher's help:)

[tdjohnsn.livejournal.com]

Tracking body fat percentage was a real eye opener for me. Especially since it goes along with lean body mass to determine overall health. I had heard of being "skinny fat" but the numbers made that make sense. You can look normal weight, but if you are all squishy, it still isn't healthy. Not that I had that problem. I was just squishy and fat.

Ron and I are now at 17% or so percent body fat, 165lbs and are the same height as you we still have tummies. From what I have read the healthy range for men is between 12 and 20% and since our numbers came back from our physicals pretty perfect, that seems to be holding true.

From observation, lack of visible fat and a washboard tummy seems to kick in at around 12% or lower.

I'm pretty discouraged right now. Our diets are mostly dialed in but we don't have quite enough will power to take it all the way. Knowing you are doing such a good job with your diet actually helps a lot. Mutual support is important in a culture that emphasizes bacon donuts.

I'll pause a moment as we all imagine bacon donuts with maple icing.

I'm also discouraged because a trainer at the gym told us point blank we were too old to achieve much in terms of muscle growth and fat loss (at least as compared to the big muscle guys at the gym. We are doing great compared to old flabby guys) without testosterone replacement. But you've put on a lot of muscle and I'm only a little older than you, so I'm not sure what to think.

[theoctothorpe.livejournal.com]

While on some level, there is truth in what your trainer is saying (as you get older you simply produce less testosterone, and indeed, you can do better with replacement or other enhancements), but everyone is different in what they can do unaided. That said, how old is your trainer, 24? I'm not sure he's got an idea of what someone over 40 is capable of doing.

FWIW, I think you guys are both doing really well.

[bjarvis.livejournal.com]

I think that trainer has exaggerated the difficulty. It's not impossible to lose fat and gain muscle at our age. True, it may be a tougher slog at 45-50 years old than if we were all 20 years old, and there's no doubt one's genetics will make it easier/harder to achieve. Impossible? No, I don't buy it.

[excessor.livejournal.com]

I'll pause a moment as we all imagine bacon donuts with maple icing.

Great. Now I'm starving.

[weekilter.livejournal.com]

I'm sorry it didn't go so well for you, but starting from nothing to do major as you did was a very dangerous thing to do. If you have been sedentary you need to start gradually and work into it. Exercise is important at any age, but just remember you are no spring chicken any longer and you need to ease into this stuff.

I hope you are feeling better, but just be gentle to your old self Oké?

[dendren.livejournal.com]

I have the blast furnace thing going on too, I've never really thought about whether or not it coincides with eating. I'll have to pay attention to that. I just know it's really annoying.

I can't believe you aren't a regular gym person already. You look great for someone who has done nothing LOL sigh, I'd kill to get back down to size 31's, or at least down to 32's again. I'm fighting at staying with my 33's :P