Square Dance Etiquette Question

[bjarvis]

A relatively new square dancer asked me the following question tonight:
How do you politely deal with someone who wishes to be your dance partner but makes you exceedingly uncomfortable?

I suggested pre-emptively ensuring you have a partner already arranged for the upcoming tip but this ducks the issue rather than dealing with it. Likewise choosing to sit out a tip rather than dance with the objectionable party is inadequate: one shouldn't have to sacrifice one's own participation in an event just because of one individual.

Thoughts?

Comments

[paigemom.livejournal.com]

"There are three choices - a) accept, b) decline because one has promised this dance to (someone else), or c) decline (because "I'm sitting this one out".) It's rude to say a simple "no" and then dance with someone else."

In the contra and English country dance world, these are still considered the only polite options.

With those limitations, my personal solution to a similar problem was this: clue a bunch of good friends in to the situation. Make sure one or more of them is within "asking me to dance" range at all times. If Creepy Guy heads my way, grab one of the others and run onto the floor.

Ask Kent if he remembers the Hairy Hound from Budapest...

Also, ask around. Is this guy creepy just to the new dancer or is this a general feeling among even the more experienced folk? If it's more universal, then you've got a bigger problem...that I have no idea how to address.

[rsc.livejournal.com]

In the contra and English country dance world, these are still considered the only polite options.

There is one other that I sometimes use: "I'm trying to dance with new people for the first part of the evening." But I only say this when I mean it, and I've used it to turn down people I'd be perfectly happy to dance with.

[paigemom.livejournal.com]

oooo that's a good one!

***adds to internal etiquette file***

[trawnapanda.livejournal.com]

Ask Kent if he remembers the Hairy Hound from Budapest...

Kaparthy - that dreadful Hungarian - was HE there?

oozing charm from every pore, oiling his way across the floor? EEEEK!

[paigemom.livejournal.com]

the very one. usually with his fly wide open and coke-bottle-bottom glasses covered with a visible film of hair grease (because he never washed).