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[personal profile] bjarvis
Today, I received an unusual bit of spam in my mailbox: a political treatise from the People First Republic Party of Ontario.

I'll start by saying I have absolutely no idea how they got my email address or why they're sending this stuff to me. I haven't lived or been an eligible voter in Ontario since 1996.

Anyway, it's a surprisingly coherent if factually flawed xenophobic anti-tax anti-union diatribe. The easiest clue that someone is off their meds is the odd capitalization: We cannot let the Global Elites in the name of Globalization continue to destroy our individual sovereign rights and freedoms and our constitutional Provincial and Federal governance systems. [...] These Foreign Legal Entities need to destroy our Traditional Canadian Rule of Law and revert to the centuries old Feudal tyranny governance systems where the Ruling Class could put them above the Rule of Law and do whatever they want, to whomever they want at any time.

Seriously, this is the style of writing one generally expects of cult leaders and/or rural Montana survivalists. I admit to having a great deal of difficulty taking the content seriously simply because the style is so overwrought as to be laughable.

Looking into their party platform, they're in favour of:
  • school vouchers for kindergarten through one's first college diploma or university degree;
  • province-wide student exams and a return to the A thru D grading system;
  • vague complaints about truth suppression "deliberately and willfully hidden and or distorted by Powerful Interests" concerning environmental & health concerns, including the dangers of wind farms, vaccines and flouridation;
  • complaints about "Global Elites" controlling our lives as evidenced by "CODEX, NAFTA, CETA, UN, IMF, WTO, GREEN ENERGY ACT, HST, OHIP HEALTH TAX, the WTO Toronto nonsense, the Raw Milk issues and The Fantino criminal matter" which they propose to fix by electing a sheriff in each riding in Ontario to be the senior law enforcement official and requiring US-style grand juries to approval all criminal charges;
  • direct election of the Premier, the Chief Justice of Ontario, all judges, all sheriffs, all Crown Prosecutors, a Chief Financial Officer, a Chief Elections Officer and an Ontario Ombudsman;
  • equal funding & scientific footing for allopathic, traditional and holistic health remedies;
  • expanding the provincial health plan to include dental care (Hey, I can get behind that one!);
  • vague hand-waving about the evils of corporations, urging legislation to ensure corporations are not treated as individuals and are subservient to sovereign individuals;
  • selling off all crown corporations;
  • provincial revenues to be frozen at 2007 levels and rolled back 5% annually for four years;
  • capping interest and financial fees;
  • a mechanism for citizen-drafted legislation to be presented in parliament;
  • a recall mechanism to fire MPPs;
  • referenda to approve any deficit spending;


I checked into some of the attachments and referenced websites. There's lots of stuff that would do a conspiracy theorist proud: we're oppressed by Rothschild bankers, being killed by modern medicine, need to return to the gold standard, believe that global warming is a scam, etc.. It was good for a chuckle.

It is getting late though as I write this so I'm going to now hit the "spam" button on my mail program and call it a night.

Date: 2011-09-22 06:12 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] billeyler.livejournal.com
Not published by "The Onion: Canada"?

Date: 2011-09-22 06:20 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] danthered.livejournal.com
a return to the A thru D grading system

A return from…what?

Date: 2011-09-22 01:13 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] snousle.livejournal.com
Even Canadian wing nuts have a certain gentle quaintness that makes me want to move back...

Date: 2011-09-22 04:37 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] weekilter.livejournal.com
I thought the whacko teabaggers were just in the US!

Date: 2011-09-22 06:56 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dr-scott.livejournal.com
Actually there's a long tradition of populist Canadian wingnuttery, co-opted and repressed as is the Canadian way. Sounds like an interesting mix of good reform ideas (sell off Crown corporations!) and crackpot notions (equal funding for alternative medicine!)

Date: 2011-09-23 06:09 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] abqdan.livejournal.com
Well, I might be with them on the alopathic vs 'alternative' issue. Massage and acupuncture used to be considered 'fringe' medicine; now medical insurance typically covers acupuncture and some cover massage. The benefits of both (though not necessarily the mode of operation) is well documented by science.

So - it is possible, if more research went in to different treatment systems, including herbal remedies, we might well benefit. The big pharma industry of course wants to discourage use of herbal remedies (they're too cheap and you can't patent them). Yet many of our modern drugs are derived from study of Native American medicine, which was centered on herbs.

As the rest of their list... oh dear.

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