Not Feeling It

[bjarvis]

I'm in a particularly strange state of mind right at the moment. It's the Christmas season, it's winter, I have a paid vacation day tomorrow... all social conventions indicate I'm supposed to be happy & filled with warm xmas cheer. But I'm really not.

Xmas is just feels like yet another artificial holiday larded up with external demands and social obligations.

Sure, it's nice that people are working a little harder on being nice to each other at this time of year, but why do we need a holiday to do that? Shouldn't we be doing that the other 364 days of the year too?

It's lovely that families get reacquainted during the holiday season. But do why do we need a calendar-based excuse to do that?

I do like the occasional xmas card in the mail but --and this is strictly my failing-- they're just a reminder to me of yet another social obligation: to send a card in return. Gift-giving for the nieces & nephew is made tolerable by the Internet, otherwise I'd just write off the entire damn exercise as too anxiety-ridden and logistically difficult to bear.

Even tomorrow's vacation day doesn't have the heft it used to since I work from home 80% of the time. Having a 30 second commute is nice but it's robbed the joy out of sleeping in on a weekday.

I'm not depressed in any way, just sort of blasé about the entire holiday season. There's no sadness or lack of sociability, just not the glad-tidings-to-all I remember from the days when I had significantly fewer responsibilities.

I think I need to go play with a litter of puppies or something.

Comments

[bradferd23.livejournal.com]

Sure, it's nice that people are working a little harder on being nice to each other at this time of year, but why do we need a holiday to do that? Shouldn't we be doing that the other 364 days of the year too?


I have been tallying store clerks. Out of the stores I have been in this holiday season, three have said Merry Christmas and I have one that has said Happy Holidays.

I don't feel it either.

[paigemom.livejournal.com]

Believe me, a child on the premises makes all the difference.

[apparentparadox]

One PBGV is better than a litter of puppies.

[dendren.livejournal.com]

I'm right there with you on the artificial holiday thing. I've really just tried to step back the last few years, enjoy the pretty lights and be the same relatively nice person to other people I am the rest of the year :)

...

[dorisduke.livejournal.com]

The only way a holiday/Christmas can be anything less is if you make it as such. How others feel or act is beyond ones control, but how you feel or act is yours only. Why do we need a day or season to remind us, well the same reason we need a Monday to remind us it is Monday.

[weekilter.livejournal.com]

Or a liter of puppies!

[cjsmith.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I'm not feeling it either. My immediate family ditched the gift-giving thing two years ago, my brother and my sister have both not shown up at all this year (with good excuses, but still), and I haven't done the card obligation for so long that people have mostly stopped sending me any. When you take out the things that you Don't Want To Do But For The Sense Of Obligation, there really is not much left.

I think that today I will make rum balls. Because some holiday traditions I actually enjoy. :-)

(Oh, by the way: Merry Christmas! I'm sitting here catching up on a week of LJ while the rest of the house wakes up.)